by Olivia Percival
For as long as I can remember I have always felt a sort of fear lurking in the background of my life; a Boogie Monster of sorts. At times he (or she) has been quiet, I even thought he may have disappeared at various points over the years. But then, seemingly unprompted, he would appear in my solar plexus; raging and unavoidable. I felt completely smothered in anxiety that I couldn’t face, and so certain of disastrous and dark outcomes in my life. (Which of course ultimately never came to pass.)
Each time it happened it was like having the whole rug pulled from under my feet. Full sabotage. Often nothing external had happened to trigger this dramatic undoing, only the machinations of an unruly mind.
Anyways, last week on Vipassana I finally had some revelations about my Boogie Monster: